Daily Bafflements

• The SEIU is still trying to get a $15 hourly wage out of McDonald’s. Meanwhile, McDonald’s workers in nineteen cities have filed a new complaint against the company for what they say are safety hazards. “Workers cite a persistent lack of gloves for handling hot equipment and say they have been burned while cleaning grills that must be kept on,” according to the AP. “One worker said he was told by a manager, ‘Put mayonnaise on it, you’ll be good.'”

• Cops in the UK admit they routinely stop-and-frisk toddlers, or, as the Telegraph calls the little criminals, “under fives.”

• Our favorite zinger about Starbucks’s starry-eyed and awkward #RaceTogether campaign was this one, from Alex Pareene.

• Forbes, of all places, is holding a NCAA-style bracket to determine the most obnoxious startup jargon, and it’s accepting nominations now. They’ve got a pretty good start with “bootstrap,” “ramp up,” “circle back,” and “ping,” though.