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Your Future President/Governor/Senator Is Having a Small New Hampshire Problem

A carpetbag

How different can Massachusetts and New Hampshire possibly be? They’re both dinky little states in New England that vote for Barack Obama and root for Satan’s baseball team and talk weird. The GOPs in both states aren’t rich with True Conservatives who hunt cattle or whatever. Hell, New Hampshire Republicans love John McCain. So since Massachusetts Republicans were just fine with a RINO senator like Scott Brown for a few years—even in defeat to Elizabeth Warren, he left office with high approval numbers—shouldn’t the Hampshies eat up his hot bod just the same if he decides to run for U.S. Senate there?

No, because New Hampshire Republicans are, in fact, pseudo-libertarian gun nuts. Per NPR:

The former Massachusetts senator—and a soon-to-be official resident of Rye, N.H.—arrived at the New Hampshire GOP’s holiday party in his trademark pickup truck Thursday evening, and was greeted by more than one hundred chanting protesters.

The protesters—mostly gun rights activists but also a few Democrats—wore stickers bearing slogans like “If it’s Brown, flush it!” and waved signs reading “Brownbagger Go Home to Mass.”

Ace job with the poop joke, New Hampshire.

You would think that a state that welcomes a dozen or so presidential candidates who all claim to be authentic White Mountaineers every four years would be open to poopbaggers like Scott Brown moving to their states and claiming the very same, asking only for one measly Senate seat. Maybe they are. We’re only talking about 100 or so protesters showing up, some of whom were Democrats, while the rest were probably paid fauxtesters from the NRA. On the other hand, who is this jerk claiming it’s a coincidence that he’s moving his family to New Hampshire while simultaneously considering running for political office in that state? And double-simultaneously considering running for president (!), for which a New Hampshire primary victory would certainly be necessary if he were to win?

The guy still has Massachusetts license plates on that famous dumb truck he drives around, too.

On another note, though, let’s consider what might make Scott Brown too “liberal” a Republican to win a primary in a New England state. From Politico:

“His coming here is calculated disrespect, just as if he went to Saudi Arabia with pork chops in his suitcase,” said Jay Simkin, a 60-something economic consultant who lives in Nashua. “If he wants gun control, he should stay in Massachusetts.”

Simkin was among the people, most clad in orange hunting gear and a few carrying guns, who stood in a dark and snowy park to tell the ex-Massachusetts senator that they don’t want him to run for Senate. They singled out his support for a federal assault weapons ban, his opposition to a national conceal-and-carry law and the endorsement he received from gun-control proponent New York Mayor Michael Bloomberg last year.

Yep, that was Scott Brown’s big faux pas last year among the rank and file, even in New Hampshire, where this Simkin fellow is worried he won’t be allowed to hunt with high-capacity semi-automatic weapons anymore. Scott Brown announced that he supported a federal assault weapons ban after someone walked into a Connecticut elementary school and murdered nearly two dozen children. Why couldn’t Scott Brown just grow a spine at the time and not be affected by the news that nearly two dozen children had been murdered? Now, even if he is perhaps the state GOP’s best chance to defeat an incumbent Democrat, the primary race may prove to be too difficult a challenge.